Posts tagged funny
Murphy’s Laws of Computing
Nov 12th
I was given this by my first manager in an IT gig. I came across it again during a late night search trying to solve a downed production server without going into the office… Turns out I glanced @ it, got to number 10 and a light bulb popped over my head. I hate consultants and I hate tech support. Hope this brightens your a day – and let me know if you know the REAL author.
Murphy’s Laws of Computing
- When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen.
- When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it?s probably obsolete.
- The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it.
- When the going gets tough, upgrade.
- For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.
- To err is human…to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, it is downright natural.
- He who laughs last probably made a back-up.
- If at first you do not succeed, blame your computer.
- A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.
- The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions.
- A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want it to do.
(Video) Blast from the past! Now that’s a fast computer.
Sep 11th
7MB of Memory?!?… 3600 baud modems what a blast from the past Married With Children Style.
Enjoy!
Caffeinated soap? Are you serious?
May 16th
(NOW BACK IN STOCK!)
Hey there??? Hi!!!??
How’s it going?????
Nothings wrong! Why do you ask????
Oh no. We always shake lIkE thAt!
DoEsN’t EveRyOnE???
Alright we got the pleasantries out of the way now – Holy crap it has happened. This is something straight out of Futurama. (Sorry for the re-run!)
That’s right you shower and lather up this “Shower Shock” and get a heaping dose of caffeine.
Just don’t stay in there for hours and come out shaking. Unless of course you are into that kind of thing. Don’t worry we don’t judge…
Aw who are we kidding – of course we judge and snicker.
Check out this item from our favorite online shop ThinkGeek – Starting at $7 a bar. It’s cheaper than Starbucks – Kind of…
Mornings Have Never Been So Invigorating!
- Tired of waking up and having to wait for your morning java to brew?
- Are you one of those groggy early morning types that just needs that extra kick?
- Know any programmers who don’t regularly bathe and need some special motivation?
Introducing Shower Shock, the original and world’s first caffeinated soap from ThinkGeek. When you think about it, ShowerShock is the ultimate clean buzz.
It Works! Featured On…
- TechTV
- NBC
- MSNBC
- CNN
- Good Morning America
- Washington Post
- Ripley’s Believe It Or Not
- Your Bathroom!
Shower Shock is an all vegetable based glycerine soap which does *not* contain any harsh ingredients like ethanol, diethanolamine, polyethylene glycol or cocyl isethionate. So it’s a gently invigorating soap ;) Scented with peppermint oil and infused with caffeine anhydrous, each bar of Shower shock contains approximately 12 servings/showers per 4 ounce bar with 200 milligrams of caffeine per serving. No, we’re not kidding and no you don’t eat it. The caffeine is absorbed through the skin. For maximum effect, ThinkGeek recommends that you build up a good Shower Shock lather across your entire body before rinsing!
Have smelly co-workers that sleep in too much? Give them the gift of Shower Shock… Plus AtA gets a few pennies on the dollar for your purchase via any of these links! Help us help you by buying us a new server and getting some stuff in the process… Who doesn’t need stuff!
Or for that smelly geek you can’t bring yourself to get any where near even when you need their help!
_TheShakEyAdmiN_ sEnD MorE samPlEs PlEaSe :)
The secret revealed: Why talentless people have great jobs.
Apr 11th
Dilbert’s Scot Adams, Can be so seriously on point sometimes:
Another way To Annoy People legally…
Feb 13th
Following in the footsteps of the Annoy-O-Tron we wrote about a little whiles back, we have another gadget that can make a grown man cry! Some of you guys wrote in $10 was too rich for your blood. We heard you loud and clear and this one is only $8.95 available here.
This tiny little remote is ready for secret missions. Secret missions to annoy the shit out of unsuspecting people, that is! Another great find from ThinkGeek.
- Are you a little brother who is sick of watching American Idol or similarly stupid shows?
- Bored out of your mind in a waiting room?
- Or maybe you are just an Asshole?
Well than this tool of annoyance is for you!
This little universal remote is the newest (secret shhh) weapon in the Ninja’s arsenal and we assure you in the right hands it can be used to quickly assassinate dangerously annoying TV shows or turn on equally annoying TV shows to over come your victims. Simply point the Ninja Remote at the intended target (a television set) and press the mute button for a few seconds – once the TV mutes the remote is now ready to assume full control of its victim.
Innocent bystanders will be frozen with fear (or very animated with anger) as the volume and channel change magically in front of their eyes, seemingly controlled by some mysterious force.
Your Ninja Skills can only be outwitted by another Ninja Remote, the actual real remote or Someone bigger than you that WILL proceed to kick your ass… Oh wait your a Ninja right? We take no responsibility for getting you beat up – use caution. (Don’t pick on people bigger than you )
The Ninja Remote’s powers will work on a wide variety of televisions (Sony, Panasonic, Samsung, Toshiba, Sanyo, Aiwa, Mitsubishi, Philips, JVC, Sharp, etc) and its small size will safeguard you against discovery. 
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Can you keep my coffee hot while I help the end losers?
Feb 12th
Excuse me while I vent a little. I hate it when I come into the office with a nice hot cup of $6.00 coffee and someone manages to drag me over to their cube or office to “Show Me Something” instead of just explaining it. We do speak the same language and all – I think so at least.
Well this little do-hickey I just ordered from ThinkGeek should put an end to my ice cold hot coffee and my luke warm iced cold drink. It is a simple little USB Warmer/Cooler that will keep whatever is placed on it …
Are you paying attention?
Yes?
Warm or Cold?
I am glad you are still with us.
I’m sure this will be right up there with the caffeinated soap!
It’s perfect and it’s simple – a hotplate powered by USB keeps your coffee warm. But if Alton Brown has taught us anything is that we hate a single-use tool. That, and, sometimes we like our caffeine served cold. No problem, ’cause we’ve got you covered!
Just flip a switch, and the hot-plate turns into a peltier device, quickly cooling to 45 degrees Fahrenheit (7 degrees Celcius). Sweet! By maintaining optimum temperatures for your caffeine delivery system, you can enjoy increased work productivity and nice twitchy gaming reflexes.
Just know that it’s not powerful enough to chill a room temperature drink, or warming cold coffee – that kind of ability is sneaking dangerously close to x-factor mutant ability! It will, however, delay the inevitable march towards room temperature.
Shiny and jet-black, so it also looks wicked-cool on your desktop.
Features
- Connection via USB
- Coldplate chills to 45?F
- Hotplate warms to 120?F
- Helps keeps your beverage at optimum temperature
- USB cable length: 2 feet
- Power consumption: 5.75W
- Dimensions: 5.25″ x 3.25″ x 1.4″
- Bawls and Coffee not included
